Abused Child - Blessed Adult 

(This story follows well after Revenge-Vengeance page.  You may want to read this page first.)  

"My Personal Testimony"

     I was born in El Paso, Texas. My dad was in the booming oil field. We moved to where I live now at the age of 8 to Odessa, Texas. Raised in a Christian parent's home I had my Salvation experience at the young age of nine. I had been under conviction for some time, and then one night in a service at our church I was spoken to by God. The next night the pastor was asked by me and my parents to come over and talk about accepting the free gift of salvation that Jesus had to offer. I received Jesus Christ and was baptized at the age of nine. It was a wonderful experience and I felt God alive in my heart for the first time. It was as though I could hear all the angels in heaven rejoicing. As I continued to grow in the Lord I became more aware that he was calling me into the ministry. Then one summer at the age of twelve I attended a church camp for young people. At the end of the first day of camp it was time to go back to the cabin. It was really dark for there was no lighting and I walked with a friend and there appeared a bright light to the right of me. I could not see this bright light but I felt it's presence. So as I continued to walk I them realized this bright light was God as He was talking to me. God told me: Stephen I have great plans for you. And I will prepare you and take care of you as you do my service. I am calling you to be a minister of the gospel and to follow my will as I have shared with you here. You just preach and evangelize for me and I will take care of the rest. This totally blew my mind, and my friend could not comprehend to who I was talking to, as he thought I was crazy. But as we continued to walk I was able to talk to my friend and share with him what God had told me He wanted me to do for my life. As we got back to the cabin and I had this experience I was so excited I couldn't even sleep. I talked to the pastor and told him the experience I had, and was ready to give my life to Jesus. I dedicated my life that night to doing the Lord's will and his work. The next night at invitation time I decided to go down and dedicate my life to Jesus and His service.
     As my life appears one filled with love and normalcy, it wasn't. Because I was abused and my parent's never knew it was happening. It started a chain of event's that caused and made my life develop into panic, anxiety, depression, and loneliness. Though God had called me to serve Him it did not eliminate the problems that I had. Being abused was a horrifying event in my childhood, but with Gods help I made it through; Alive and continue to serve Him as He wills me to do. Doing His will does not come easy and does not eliminate the problems. But by the grace of God it Helps the problems. Alot of people have asked me how can you serve God and have gone through what you have and still have, and serve Him. But when God calls you to do something for Him He takes care of you and provides a way. God only asks for you to be available and that is the key to serving Him. I have answered His call for my lifetime I am His and He is mine. Through His redeeming Blood and through His Grace I am His. Jesus is the very reason I live and the very reason I survive. I serve Jesus on the internet for He has called me to be His minister.
     Though I may have the problems of panic, depression and anxiety; Jesus still loves me. Jesus does not look at what we are or what we have, He looks at the soul and the intentions of our Heart. He uses the Least of us. "For you see your calling, brethren, how that not Many Mighty noble, are called: But God has chosen the Foolish things of the world to confound the Wise; and God hath chosen the WEAK things of the world to confound the things which are Mighty;" 1 Corinthians 1:26&27. "For I determined not to know any thing among you, save Jesus Christ, and Him crucified" That your faith should not stand in the Wisdom of Men, but in the Power of God" 1 Corinthians 2:2&5. "Jesus prayed~"I thank thee, O Father, Lord of heaven and earth, Because thou hast HID these things from the WISE and PRUDENT, and hast REVEALED them unto BABES. Even so, Father; for so it seemed good in thy sight" Matthew 11:25&26. "They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came Not to call the Righteous, but Sinners to repentance." Mark2:17. " are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be Exceeding Glad; for Great is your reward in heaven." Matthew 5:11&12. For if we had no problems, would we need him? He knows our heart. Jesus I love you for how you loved me, yet you came yourself to die for me. I also thank you Jesus for your loving hand of forgiveness. Thank you for calling me to minister for you. Though I have blemishes and scares You still use me. There is a story about 2 women. One woman raised in a Christian home, as normal as can be considered normal; not alot of changes, would say she was well adjusted, grows up to live for God and as most, wants to get a taste of the world, but goes on and continues to live for God, and lives a productive life handling the everyday stresses, and continuing on.
     Then there is another woman, who is born into abuse and neglect, and falls into the only pattern she has ever known; a life of sin, looking to be loved and finding it nowhere, but doing everything she can to find it. She wants desperately to Really live, but no one has told her how yet. When she is 19, someone shares the love of Jesus with her and she Runs to the alter to repent! She has finally experienced Unconditional love, what she has been looking for all her life. She loves Jesus with all her heart, but she does not have the social skills nor the understanding of what a quote so called normal Christian is. She feels guilty for having emotional problems, she has prayed and asked God to remove this thorn, and feels like she does not meet up to what everyone else thinks she should be as a believer in Jesus. But in Gods Great Mercy, He has a plan for this woman. He is going to use her pain for His glory. You see she is the woman who came to Jesus at the Pharasee's house, and fell to His feet weeping and began to wash His feet with her tears, and wiped them with her hair. The Pharasee thought, "If this man was the Son of God then He would know what kind of woman this is". And Jesus knew what he was thinking to himself; and asked him a question. Now I ask you to find the answer to this question by going to the book of Luke chapter 7:36-50 and find the answer. You see the first woman is an over-comer. But the second woman is More than an over-comer!

     My prayer is that all who enter here will find this a place of refuge, and mercy. For mercy surely triumphs over judgment. If you do not know Jesus and want to know Him like I do please email me. That is what I am here for! You cannot wait until you get your life together. You come to Jesus Just as you are. Broken, sin and all! If you know Jesus but struggle as this woman in the story; please email me. If you want to talk with another woman I can lead you to the woman in this story. Jesus said He came to heal the broken hearted. And he uses people like me and you.

~I offer you Jesus~ 

May God Richly Bless You!
A Servant For The King of Kings, Jesus Christ


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